Unfortunately, she didn’t realize what she had done until she returned later in the day with some newspapers to recycle.  It was then that she also realized that the dumpster had been compacted.  Not good.

This is where the story takes a turn.  She calls her husband, tells him the news, and he lets her know that he’d be right there.  When he shows up he has a choice.  He can get angry at the situation or he can help his wife find her purse.  It’s that simple.  Marriage difficulties.

So what does he do?  He immediately goes dumpster diving.  No lecture.  No guilt trips.  No ‘why did you have to interrupt my day?’ comment muttered under his breath.  My friend jumped into a dumpster, dug threw tons of crushed boxes, and found his wife’s purse.

In marriage, difficulties can come at us from all directions.  Sometimes our spouses make honest mistakes.  In those moments we all have a choice.  We can rush in, make them feel worse and belittle them or we can dive in to help them.

My friend willingly dove into a dumpster because that’s what you do for your wife.  But that’s not the impressive part.  It’s not what he did but how he did it.  I don’t know many guys who would have responded so well.

Ok, so you want to know how to save a marriage because it seems like your relationship has reached the point of no return.  I’m here to tell you that it hasn’t.

You are reading this right now because you have a desire to get back what was lost.  That’s a good sign.  If neither of you had that desire I say you should search for articles on ‘how to get a divorce’ instead articles on ‘how to save a marriage’!

The good news is this, you care and you’re willing to fight for your marriage or you wouldn’t be here.  That’s a good starting point!

So what now?  Well, now all that you need is the right tools to save your marriage.  Think about it like this, say someone is really out of shape physically.  One of the best ways for him/her to get back in shape would be to get a personal trainer or a coach right?   A coach would do three basic things: save a marriage, advice, save a marriage, problems, save a marriage, help, save a marriage,

1)  Evaluate the person’s current condition;  save a marriage,

2)  Identify his/her strengths and weaknesses; save a marriage,

3)  Recommend certain tools/exercises to strengthen the weak spots;

4)  Offer motivation and encouragement to keep moving forward; how to save a marriage,

Those are the things that a good coach does when someone is weak and wants to get in shape.  Guess what?  Those are the same four things that  a weak marriage needs and that’s why we’re here!  , how to save a marriage,advice,how to save a marriage, problems, save a marriage,

So you want to know how to save a marriage?  You’ve come to the right place!  Start by taking the marriage quiz.  It will enable you to quickly evaluate your marriage, identify the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship, and recommend specific resources to help your weak spots.  save a marriage,advice,save a marriage,save a marriage, how to save a marriage,

Getting your marriage score is a great starting point because you cannot know exactly what work needs to be done until you evaluate where you are.  We’re glad that you’re here!  how to save a marriage, how to save a marriage, how to save a marriage

Please look around and check out the marriage quiz.  It could very well be the first step in saving your marriage.  All the best!

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So do you really want to know where things really stand in your marriage?
Try the best online marriage quiz available…

It’s Quick, Easy, & Confidential!

Quickly analyzes 10 key areas of your marriage
Generates your Marriage Score and Easy to Read Report
Recommends Resources Based on Your Strengths and Weaknesses

Sample Report

How to Get Your Coaching Report and Marriage Score:

• Click the “Get Your Marriage Score” Button to Register.
• Take the Marriage Quiz together or solo.
• Your responses are instantly analyzed.  Marriage quiz.
• An easy to read “Coaching Report” is generated for each person taking the marriage quiz which includes: A Relationship Profile that reveals the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship, Recommended Resources that Target the Primary ‘Weak Spots’, and your Marriage Score.  Marriage quiz.
• Print your Coaching Report and begin to strengthen your relationship immediately!  Marriage quiz.
• A password is automatically emailed to you allowing you to access your Coaching Report for one week after you take the marriage quiz. You can access it and/or print it as many times as you like during that period.  Marriage quiz.

You’re Invited to take the Marriage Quiz today!

Marriage Quiz

So you suspect that your marriage is in trouble but how do you really know if it’s time to get help? Here are a few warning signs. If any of these hurtful habits and behaviors exist in your relationship, it’s time to reach out and get help for you and your spouse. Marriage Trouble
1) Dishonesty - Good relationships are built on truth and trust. There’s no room for even the smallest bit of dishonestly between you and your spouse.  Marriage trouble.
2) Constant Criticism – We all should be able to take a bit of constructive criticism but if we can never say anything positive about our spouses and if one or both of you are hyper-critical then there’s a problem.
3) Abuse – There are many types of abuse…verbal, physical, and emotional. There is no room for any of it, period.
4) Infidelity – Just like there are many types of abuse, there are also many types of infidelity…sexual, emotional, or anything else that takes priority over our spouses and betrays his/her trust.  Marriage Trouble.
5) Disrespect – Great marriages have high levels of respect. If one or both of you don’t feel valued, appreciated and respected there’s a problem.
So what do you do if some of these things are currently at work in your relationship? Get the help and the marriage advice that you need. Don’t wait and assume that things will automatically get better.   Marriage Trouble, advice, Marriage trouble, problems, marriage trouble.

Here are a few posts that may point you in the right direction:  Marriage Trouble.
Marriage Advice,
When a Marriage is in Trouble,
Marriage Help,

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Below you’ll find the Top Ten New Year’s Resolutions for your marriage. Talk through this list with your husband or wife then agree on at least five resolutions that you’ll work on together in the year ahead.  Marriage Advice.

Compliment and Brag on your Spouse – Healthy marriages have high levels of respect. Both husbands and wives need to know that they are loved unconditionally, valued, appreciated, and worth pursuing. Commit not to simply telling your husband and wife how incredible they are, tell them in front of other people.

Be Honest – Clear, open and honest conversation is essential to strong marriages. Couples must be able to relate well, resolve conflicts without name calling and extend forgiveness frequently. In order for a marriage to remain healthy and strong no topic can be ‘off limits’.

Talk about Your Faith – It’s critical that husbands and wives encourage each other spiritually. Each person is committed to understanding the other person’s beliefs and thoughts related to religion and faith. One of the best things that we can do for our spouses is to help him/her grow in their relationship with God.

Be a Good Friend First – It’s essential for couples to laugh and have fun together. Common interests are important however husbands and wives that are close friends also give each other permission to be themselves.

Fight Fair – Husbands and wives don’t have to agree on every topic but there’s a good way to express your feelings without saying hurtful things that you’ll regret. When you find yourself in an argument, don’t simply walk away mad, decide to keep talking and working through things so that neither of you will go to bed angry.

Make Time for Intimacy – It’s important for husbands and wives to be intimate allies confiding, sharing and supporting each other in every way possible. People in thriving marriages remain committed to romance, fulfilling sexual needs and offering emotional support. If you have to put it on the calendar, then put it on the calendar!

Be Romantic – Whether it’s leaving small notes, voicemails, or texts, find ways to flirt with your spouse. Find ways to let your husband or wife know that they are worth pursuing and that you’d marry them all over again.

Set Clear Financial Goals – With financial disagreements being one of the leading factors behind many divorces, it’s critical for husbands and wives to set financial goals together. Decide how you are going to work to eliminate debt and save for the future together.

Be Intentional about Building your Marriage – Healthy marriages don’t just happen, they’re designed and built. In order for husbands and wives to continue to grow closer, both individuals must intentionally invest time and energy into the marriage.

Find a Way to Serve Every Day – People in strong marriages know the importance of serving one another and the value of teamwork. This may very well be the best piece of marriage advice out there. Each day ask yourself, what can I do to make my husband’s or wife’s life day better today?

Don’t settle for a mediocre marriage. This year decide in advance to give your marriage the attention that it deserves.

Happy New Year from MyMarriageCoach.com!

Marriage Advice Marriage Advice Marriage Advice

So what do you do?  Marriage trouble.

While there are no magical formulas there are certain steps that you can take that will lead you in the right direction.

Here are a few things that you can do immediately:    Marriage Trouble.

1)  Remember that your relationship is worth fighting for.  Decide to do whatever it takes to strengthen it.

2)  Be intentional.  Don’t just hope that things will get better.  Develop a plan to improve things and follow  it.  Marriage Trouble.

3)  Commit to open and honest communication. Always try to begin with positive statements about what you love about your spouse.  Let him/her know how you feel but steer clear of jabs, name calling, and flinging comments only to inflict pain and hurt.

4)  Evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship. Don’t settle for generalizations like, “I’m just unhappy” or “I guess we just fell out of love”.  Nail down the reasons behind those feelings.  Zero in on the area(s) that are lacking or causing conflict and get your hands on all the resources you can on that particular area.  (By the way, that’s exactly why this site exists.  The Marriage quiz will help you quickly identify the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship and help you grab the resources that you need).  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.

5)  Focus on making things better each day. Know that it will take time to restore and strengthen your marriage but you can turn things around.  Marriage Trouble.

6)  Don’t go it alone. Pull others that you trust into the conversation (i.e, counselors, pastors, or good friends).  Decide who you can talk to then go together to talk through the issues, express your feelings, and develop a plan to strengthen your relationship.

Most importantly, know that you can do this.  You and your spouse may be in a difficult place right now, your relationship may be in trouble but know that things can change.  Marriage Trouble.Marriage Trouble.Marriage Trouble.Marriage Trouble.

I hope that you found the things listed above helpful and that one day you look back to today and say, “You know, that was the day when I decided not to settle for any thing less than an incredible marriage!”  Marriage Trouble.

Marriage Trouble.   Marriage Trouble.     Marriage Trouble.

Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.

Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.  Marriage Trouble.

Each year leading up to Christmas we spend all kinds of time and energy searching for the perfect gifts for the people that we love.  We all want to get them the best gift possible right?  It’s just what we do this time of year and that’s a good thing.

So if you’re still wondering what to get your husband or wife please allow me to make a suggestion.  Give them the gift of your time and your presence.  That’s actually the best marriage advice that I can give this time of year.  Sure, shower them with the store bought gifts that they’ve dropped hints about but also make sure you block off some time this Christmas just to be together.  It really is the best gift that we have to give and it will help your marriage immensely.

Someone once said that “Time is the greatest currency of love, not money”.   Think about that for a minute.   Do you really believe that?  If you do, then that’s going to affect the way you approach Christmas this year.

Trust me ladies, your husbands will appreciate a quiet romantic dinner with you at your favorite restaurant much more than another pair of slippers or a tie.  Guys, your wives will love a couple of nights at a bed and breakfast much more than a sweater and a pair of shoes.

Now, I’m not suggesting that you give your time to your spouse simply to get out of buying a gift!  (So guys don’t tell your wives that a weekend away with you is just as good as a pair of diamond earrings!)  That’s not exactly what I’m talking about.  I’m talking about making sure that your marriage doesn’t get neglected during this busy season.  I’m talking about blocking off some time to spend with your spouse.

That’s actually what my wife and I have decided that we’re going to give each other this year for Christmas.  We talked and we both already have everything that we need.  The one thing that we don’t have enough of is time to spend with each other so we decided that we’re going to get away together for a couple of days after Christmas.  We don’t have an agenda.  Our only plan is to be together.  That’s our gift to each other and I’ve got to tell you that really will be the best gift I could ask for.

You know, the material things that we give don’t really have a lasting impact do they?  It’s the time that we spend with each other, that’s what really matters.

So yes, go ahead and get her the diamond earrings but also remember that the greatest gifts that we can give to our spouses will be our time, our presence, and our undivided attention.

Merry Christmas!

The idea is to take a moment sometime tomorrow to call or text your spouse to let them know how much you love them.  It seems like a small thing but it can make all the difference in the world.

So sometime tomorrow, think about what your husband or wife needs to hear from you, then give them a call or send them a text to tell them.  Let them know how much they mean to you.

It might even be good to make a note to do the same thing once a week.   Why not right?  Reminding our spouses that we’re still in love with them and that we’d marry them all over again that’s what separates good marriages from mediocre ones.   Good luck and let me know how it goes!

Divorce won’t be the best choice for him, his wife, or their two children.  Even though it may look like the best way forward, this will be a decision that will radically alter his family forever.

Your friend assures you that they’ve tried everything possible to rescue their relationship but the passion is simply gone.  There’s no abuse, no affair, no addictions.  There is however, loads of stress.  Money is tight.  He’s working two jobs.  She just lost her dad and now she’s taking care of her mom who was just diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.  She claims he’s never at home.  He says that even when he is around that she doesn’t have any time left for him.

It breaks your heart because you know them both extremely well.  You’ve seen them in the good times.  They truly are good for each other but they’ve hit a really tough spot.  They both will tell you that their marriage has reached the point of no return.

You don’t want to see them give up on their marriage but what do you do?  What kind of marriage advice do you offer someone who has already decided to walk away?  Well, if you really are his friend, you convince him to stay and fight for his marriage and his family.  Let him know that it’s worth it and tell him that you’ll help him fight.  It’s the only thing to do.

In his book “For the Honor of the Vow”, Robert Cossick says that guys who are thinking about walking away from their wives must have a wingman.  He writes, “Your most important tool or resource is going to be a good friend who will tell it to you straight, will hold you accountable, and will lock arms with you to help carry you through;” p. 47.

If you truly care about your friend and his marriage, be his wingman.  Tell him what he needs to hear instead of what he wants to hear.  Let him know that he can rebuild his marriage.  In fact, one of the best things that you can do is get him the book I just mentioned, “For the Honor of the Vow”.  (It’s written primarily for guys but ladies can certainly benefit from it too.  Type in the promo code “Tenney” and get 30% off)

It’s a powerful book that will help him to stay and fight for his marriage.  Making that decision is the first step.  It’s never too late to save a marriage.  It is possible to rebuild and you can help.

Be a wingman.

Ok, so the truth is if we truly want to take our marriages into deeper waters we all need more than just a little advice or a few tips and techniques. That’s what a great deal of marriage advice suggest…just add this or that and things will get better.  In some cases that might be helpful, but most times simply ‘tacking’ more things on won’t help. In fact, it may even bring more harm to your relationship.

Think of building your relationship as remodeling or expanding your home.  Before additions can be made you’ve got to decide what has to go. In architecture it’s called a demolition plan. Certain things have to ripped out and thrown in the dumpster before new things are put into place.  Marriage Advice

The are certain things in your relationship that need to go. Old habits, attitudes and behaviors must be inspected to see if they healthy and helpful. How can you tell? If they aren’t loving and respectful of your spouse it’s time to let them go. Pornography, addictions, criticism, and nagging…it all has to go.

If you don’t know where to begin just ask your spouse. Simply ask him or her to name a couple of things that they wished weren’t present in your relationship. Then work together to demolish them.

Looking for some good marriage advice? Start with the necessary demolition work. Before you can rebuild, you have to demolish the things that are not working or adding value to your relationship.  advice.  advice.  advice.  advice.